Henry miller makes me want to disappear into my own skin.
It is this grand mystery that I am desperate to understand. But the more I try to penetrate the mystery, the more elusive it becomes, leaving me to be like a dog, forever chasing my tail.
I promised you fluff, but it appears I have run out. So let’s follow this course for a while and see where it leads us.
Today was tough, well the start of the day was tough, I should say. I was in that difficult transition mode where you go from being time-less to time-bound. Free to not-free.
Having not played the game of work for a couple of weeks, I was tortured by the clock on the wall. Evil things, clocks and watches, they demand we pay attention to time. Tick-tock.
Time for you and time for me
, And time yet for a hundred indecisions, And for a hundred visions and revisions, Before the taking of a toast and tea.
Part of me wanted to deny the inevitable; part of me wanted to surrender. In the end, I knew resistance was futile.
Best to approach it like getting into ice-cold water, just dive right in. After you get over the initial shock, you find the water is just fine.
I turned the key to the ignition and suddenly everything felt as right as rain. I was back in sync with time, and it was just fine.
“Tell me who you spend your time with,” said Goethe, “and I’ll tell you who you are.”
Let that sink in a bit.
Who would you be according Goethe?
I scribble a few names down in my notebook. After a few minutes, I scratch the names out. The truth is I spend a great deal of time with myself, lost in the valley of my own mind. Even when I’m with people, I’m somewhere else in my head chasing rabbits, not the ten-foot tall variety, but the ones whose holes run deeper then I’ve been.
I’m not sure what that says about who I am. Maybe you have a better clue.